A school has advised parents to spend more time with their children instead of “compensating” them with gifts.

Calcutta International School asked parents during a recent “coffee meet” on the campus to give kids their “undivided time and attention”.

“We have been telling parents to spend more time with their kids and talk to them,” said Pratima Nayar, principal, junior school, Calcutta International School.

“We tell parents to listen to their kids. Look at them while they speak” said Nayar.

Most parents blamed their busy schedule for not giving enough time to their children.

Some of them work outside the city and come home only on weekends or after a fortnight and end up compensating for their absence with gifts.

“I come to Calcutta once every three weeks, for three or four days. Recently, I could not attend my 7-year-old’s parent-teacher meeting and another school event. She was very upset. Naturally, I had to get her gifts,” said a father who lives in Mumbai and his daughter goes to a south Calcutta school.

Coffee meets for parents of the students in Pre-nursery to Class XII at Calcutta International School are scheduled for November.

It is a forum where the school principals of the junior and senior schools and section heads talk to parents informally.

“Besides academics, we talk to parents about the emotional and mental well-being of the kids. Parents also share their concerns,” said Nayar. The physical presence of being in the same room is also important, said psychiatrist Jai Ranjan Ram.

“Parenting should not be limited to disciplining the child and inquiring about progress alone. There should be more conversation about mundane and routine things,” said Ram.

The grouse of adults is that children do not understand the “value” of things.

Ram said they would understand the value of things only when they are exposed to how the other side lives.

“Schools have to be more creative in their approach. An economics project in senior classes can be about how much their domestic help earns, how many family members they have and how much they spend. This will help them compare that with their lifestyle or how much they spend,” he said.