And I may yet lend you my ears. Heard me? We are talking. Are you listening? Come, let’s talk. Flap your ears, my tongue is wagging, and when my tongue wags it can be like a whiplash dipped in... oh whatever, use your imagination if you have one. But don’t overdo it, imagination can take you in prohibited places, places where you think you will talk and I will listen. Haaaah! That’s not happening. Let’s talk. Imagination is not allowed, imagination violates, imagination carries the risk of transporting you away from reality, and that cannot be a good thing. Imagine gorging on khichdi when you are only tucking into the hinds of a roasted leg of lamb. How pathetic would that be, haan? Get it? You are talking, don’t imagine this is a negotiation.

I promised talks, but did I promise more? You have a problem? Let’s talk. You want a solution, well that’s another thing. We can talk about it. Talks after talks after talks, what splendid use of time.

Meantime, I will go on doing what I do, let’s keep you busy. What is it that’s bothering you? When I have decreed that what is bothering you should not bother you, why are you getting bothered and bothering me in turn? You want to talk? Here is how it will go: Shut up.

If you are confused, listen again: Shut up. And if that is not possible for you to do, or beyond your comprehension, hand over your tongue. You heard it. Off with your tongue. I would know what use to put it to. You use it too much. You abuse it. Too much of anything is bad, did you ever hear that said?

A louse in your scalp, you pinch it out, or brush it if you are squeamish about pinching and what comes of pinching. But too many lice in your scalp, and you must give your scalp the treatment. You use a mower. Or, what’s it called, yes, a razor; you run a razor over that infested acreage. Too much is too much, too many too many. And if it is too many and too much, both at the same time, well that requires special arrangements. That is who you have become — folks in requirement of a prescription for special arrangements. You talk too much. And you are too many. Far too many for my liking. And you want to talk? This whole unseemly, unholy babble of you?

What is the point of the noise? That you might get an opportunity to talk? Because of the noise you make? Get real. I will tell you how.
Do you know of a thing called a round? Or rounds? Of being taken round and round? Round upon round? A not so merry merry-go-round? No? Let me tell you. Let me offer you a ride. I will arrange it, a roundtable, a table that goes round and round, you know what I mean, you who seem to know what I mean all the time and keep telling me this is what I really mean and this is what I mean not. Come by some day. We shall talk. I shall arrange a whole committee to talk to you since you love talking so much. You can bring your cities and towns along; your villages too. We’ve emptied enough spaces. In the prisons. Tum bhi kya yaad rakkhoge!

Let’s get on with it. Now there’s the committee and they will talk. Talk is what you wanted. Talk is what you shall get. Listen up. I never said no to talks, but let this be clear, I talk, or my committee does, and you listen. The whole point of talks is someone talks and someone listens. No point talking when no one’s listening, is there? And there’s always a point listening when someone’s talking, isn’t there? Let’s talk. You listen, and I shall talk, that’s the way these talks will go. Lend me your ears. Ah yes, your ears too. Understood?

Listen to me
You sweet nothing
Here’s what you’ll get
This rat-eaten farthing.