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Regular-article-logo Tuesday, 05 November 2024

Back to darkness

Before planning adoption, couples should get counselling in order to prepare themselves for effective parenting

The Telegraph Published 12.01.20, 06:51 PM
A legal adoption in our country is a long process; prospective parents go through arduous screening. As a result, dubious healthcare centres or ‘brokers’ offering adoption through quicker, illegal means flourish.

A legal adoption in our country is a long process; prospective parents go through arduous screening. As a result, dubious healthcare centres or ‘brokers’ offering adoption through quicker, illegal means flourish. (Shutterstock)

Sir — It was shocking to read that over 1,100 children adopted across the country have been returned to childcare institutions by their adoptive parents over the last five years, mostly owing to ‘adjustment issues’ in the case of children over eight years of age, as revealed by the country’s nodal adoption body. Older children up for adoption are generally perceived by prospective parents to be more likely to face trouble adjusting to a new school and mainstream society. This is why most couples tend to want an infant to adopt, which does not always happen. Many couples are overeager to adopt — often to combat the feelings brought on by childlessness — when they are not ready for parenting responsibilities. Instead of being patient with the newly-adopted child — as they should be, given that they are parents — these people send the child back to the childcare institutions, thereby conveniently absolving themselves of their responsibilities.

Before planning adoption, couples should get counselling in order to prepare themselves for effective parenting. They must be emotionally and mentally capable of taking care of a child. A legal adoption in our country is a long process; prospective parents go through arduous screening. As a result, dubious healthcare centres or ‘brokers’ offering adoption through quicker, illegal means flourish. They not only take a large amount of money but often also keep their customers in the dark about important information related to the child, such as his or her medical history. Such information and documents related to other crucial details are necessary for a smooth post-adoption transition.

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Adoption gives hope and a new lease of life to both the children and the families they go to. The process may not be perfect all the time, but parenthood is a time of learning, and can certainly be effective with a little more awareness and patience.

Kiran Agarwal,

Calcutta

Danger signal

Sir — Citizens are looking for newer ways to enable women to protect themselves. An aspiring scientist has developed a ‘lipstick gun’: it looks like a lipstick but can trigger a loud sound and send a distress signal to the police. Such innovations are welcome, but the fact that people feel the need for them means that society and law enforcement agencies have failed to do their job of keeping women safe.

Malini Bose,

Calcutta

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