Children should be allowed to face disappointment and parents should spend time reading with them — these are among the tips city schools are dishing out to parents.
A number of city schools have been communicating with parents online or organising for them sessions with counsellors on how to bring up children.
“Many new parents are not aware of these things. It is important to tell them (about parenting tips) and simultaneously remind older parents about them. Parents are equal partners for the holistic development of the child. If we can educate parents, that will help raise children better,” said Suman Sood, director, BD Memorial Junior School.
“Many children grow up in nuclear families and they do not have these reminders from elders,” said Sood, who is also a member of the national core committee of Early Childhood Association, a forum of preschools.
BD Memorial Junior School has been sending “tips” to parents since April through the school app and posting some of these on the social media page of the school as well.
“Help your child understand that they always cannot get what they want. Teach them about the concept of disappointmentand that it is a normalpart of life,” reads oneof the posters made by the school.
“Children have to learn to experience disappointment to be able to develop resilience. For example, often parents try to please the children and let them win a game. That is not correct always because they are making things easy for them. That will raise their expectations and when they do not get that in the real world, they find it difficult to accept disappointment,” said Sood.
Some of the other tips are letting children engage in free play and not be “overprotective”.
The school asks parents to read to their children or with them daily.
To encourage parents to read with children, Mahadevi Birla World Academy has some of the messages written on blackboards for parents to see during parent-teacher meetings.
“We have different kinds of sessions with different age groups. For children in pre-primary, we tell parents that they should allow them to fall and they will learn to get up. For those in Class III upwards, the advice is to follow an academic routine. For Class V upwards, it is to discuss the physiological changes with theirchild, which many parents try to avoid,” said Nupur Ghosh, vice-principal, Mahadevi Birla World Academy.
“Whatever we areteaching children at school, there should be a continuation of that at home,” said Ghosh.
At Swarnim International School, some of the same tips are shared with parents during the admission of two- to four-year-olds. The most commonly heard grouse of parents is that children do not eat without watching TV or some video on mobilephone.
“The same children eat tiffin in school without any aid. So at home, too, they would have to be told that this is their mealtime. They might skip food for a day or two, but will ultimately learn (to eat without watching TV or phone),” said Rumjhumi Biswas, principal, Swarnim International School.
Biswas also said children end up listening to too many “no’s and don’ts”.
“Parents tell them not to do something without giving them an alternative. If the ‘no’ is repeated so often to them, their response, too, would be ‘no’. So instead of telling them ‘no’, adults should tell them what they can do,” said Biswas.