ARCHANA VIJAYA
CELEBRITY ANCHOR
People talk about how amazing it is and that it’s life-changing but until and unless you experience it you don’t realise the intensity of this kind of love. It is love at first sight. The fact that you carry this beautiful being inside you for nine months and then you give birth and hold the child in your arms compares to nothing. Everything else seems to pale in comparison.
It’s been 45 days (since Archana gave birth to her son Avaan) and the first couple of days were challenging because, a first-time mom at 40 (smiles)... so, it was quite hectic but I have been blessed with a wonderful husband and great help. It was challenging though to navigate through the baby’s ways and means. He is experiencing everything for the first time. So, sleepless nights, waking on demand and breast-feeding as well. That’s a whole new commitment altogether. Now we are sort of getting into a rhythm. Every day is beautiful because I am discovering a new emotion every day in my baby. I literally have a ringside view where I get to see the different expressions. It’s pretty exciting.
This kind of love you cannot compartmentalise at all. You feel the bond from Day One and hopefully, it’ll get stronger. Mine is proving to be quite a boss! I have a new-found respect for every single mom, especially moms who do this without help. You are like a ninja! I have become ambidextrous and learnt how to eat with my left hand! I drove my mother crazy in the last month of my pregnancy and the first couple of weeks.
(L-R) Archana with son Avaan, Parama with son Nibir who is a bundle of cuteness in a 38-year-old sweater that was knitted by Parama’s grandmom when she was born!
PARAMA GHOSH
FASHION DESIGNER
Sometimes I still cannot believe that it actually happened because for me it’s been years of waiting. From the time I started dating Joydeep in 2000, I was in Class X and we had secretly named our children. It is strange that at that tender age, I wanted to be a mother and wanted Joydeep to be the father. So for me, Nibir (Parama’s less-than-a-month son) is a love child. I conceived him in my mind when I was dating his father.
It is completely life-changing for me. I have never experienced anything happier in my life. This is a dream that I have had for so many years. For me, ‘love’ I would say was biryani and sleep; because I am breast-feeding him, I am not having anything spicy, and because of him, I cannot sleep. This is the biggest sacrifice I have made for someone but I am all smiles. For me, this is the ultimate love. My anaesthetist kept wiping my tears because, in the OT, I was constantly crying from the moment he was born. I was overjoyed.
I think this is the love of the purest kind where you do not want anything in return. One of the most unconditional forms of love. Even in romantic love, you expect something back. We want reciprocation. In this case, his existence alone is giving me so much joy. The moment he was born, I saw my mother in a completely new light. While delivering, I realised my mother had gone through everything I was going through and for 38 years she has been tolerating me. Within three hours, I realised what a huge thing that is. I think my love for my mother grew manifold and so did my respect. I was naughty. She always says keeping awake is also lifelong. You will always worry about your child.