Is Aishwarya Rai happy?
Thus began an article I read years ago. I must confess I do not remember the rest. Or if I even read the rest. This brings to mind how I would repeatedly put Herman Melville’s Moby-Dick back on the bookshelf in my adolescent years, after a glimpse at its infamous first words: “Call me Ishmael”.
Needless to say, those words pertaining to Aishwarya Rai lent me much more food for thought. At the time the article appeared, she seemingly had it all. But was she truly happy? Is any one of us happy, for that matter? Alone or together? Or, as is increasingly the trend, as part of romantic portmanteaus? Such as #Virushka, #Brangelina, #Ranlia and the rest?
We might live vicariously through the lives of others, but we need to draw the line somewhere
I, for one, could not care less what Anushka Sharma might be feeding Virat Kohli for lunch on a balmy Monday afternoon. Nor do I have any inclination to visit the places they have clicked selfies in. We might live vicariously through the lives of others, but we need to draw the line somewhere.
Jumping over to Hollywood, is there a reason Will Smith and his wife, Jada Pinkett Smith, were never blessed with a moniker to celebrate their coupledom? Might we, through our glaring lack of care therein, have inadvertently doomed them to a largely failed relationship? When I saw The Fresh Prince yell at Chris Rock post the infamous slap (as if that was not enough) the image that came to my mind was that of a man with a serious psychological ailment. And while he might draw consolation from the thought that he did it to “protect” his wife, was Jada happy being “protected”?
A random impulse to run a search on #relationshipgoals led me to a picture of a young couple in bed. The girl appears to be taking a couple selfie. Never mind the ludicrous number of likes the post has got already. This is not what I want my relationship to look like. And yet, it seems the relationship goal of many. Perhaps, the photographer is all set to jump in for a threesome, you never know.
Back to #Virushka. I think Virat and Anushka have handled their individual successes a lot better than many celebs. Recently, I saw Virat confess about fancy sports cars meaning nothing to him any longer, and Anushka revealing her spiritual side in an Instagram post, where she is seen with the American vocalist, Krishna Das.
By all means, they are not an ordinary couple. After all, Pepsi does not take to social media to wish an ordinary couple on the birth of their first child. And yet, fame seems to have changed them the right way. Knowing they have everything, they realise the sheer futility of it all.
It is unhealthy to be happy all the time
Does Will Smith’s desire to always win at life make him happy in love? TT archives
Fame is a nice thing to have. Or so it seems to the people who hanker after it. When you do become famous, it is always about more fame. More success. In Will Smith’s memoir, the ostracised actor talks about developing an unhealthy obsession with winning. He simply had to win at everything, including a game of Monopoly with his family on Christmas Eve. It came to the point where he was ready to bankrupt his wife (in the game, of course), by making a trade-off with his son Jaden. All because he could not accept the thought of failing.
Will goes on to write that Jada was not actually playing Monopoly. She was merely enjoying precious bonding time with her family. He was playing the game, and how. For the king of properties, the one property he earnestly coveted, his home, was all but lost.
There are cracks in everything. We might glimpse that gorgeous #Virushka selfie clicked somewhere in the Alps, but never know about the fight they might have had an hour prior to taking it. Or when Virat yelled at Anushka for not packing his gluten-free snack.
The Anushka you see on the mountaintop might well have been dragged to the spot where she finally agreed to having her picture taken with some close friends. Perhaps her smile was real. Maybe it was forced. We will never know.
It is unhealthy to be happy all the time. A long time ago, I read about an actress who suffered a nervous breakdown. She spoke about how having to put on a forced smile at every moment of every day finally got to her.
To be fair, Virat and Anushka complement each other beautifully. If ever there were a “Made for Each Other” award, they would win it hands down (maybe they already have, I cannot remember). But here is the thing. Ten years on, Anushka might just post a picture of Vamika and Virat, captioning it “The world’s best dad”. A freshly confirmed divorce may not stop Anushka from accepting an invite to the Kohli household for an intimate Diwali lunch. Because Anushka and Virat are phenomenal like that. Not just while holding hands and clicking selfies.
Forget celebs, all couple journeys are intensely private. What we see is just scratching the surface.
Power is no guarantee of happiness in the long run
All couples, especially celebrity pairings, need space and peace Pixabay
I only wish Virat and Anushka a lifetime of happiness together. However, if by any chance the unfortunate event I just spoke of comes to pass, we should give them some space and peace. Instead of ranting about it at kitty parties, where Babita aunty says: “I knew he was having an affair with that other girl.” Even if she has no clue who that other girl is.
We might want Virat and Anushka to love each other a million lifetimes over, but what do they want? What will Virat want, as opposed to Anushka, with the passage of time? It takes two to make a couple, after all. Even if they are power couples. Unlike what we would like to believe, their power does not rest on our validation. It comes from their success, both individually and together. And yet, that power is no guarantee of happiness in the long run.
After all, whether you are #Virushka or just another couple navigating life, the same question stares us all in the face: “Are we happy?”
Rohit Trilokekar is a novelist from Mumbai who flirts with the idea of what it means to love. His heart’s compass swerves ever so often towards Kolkata, the city he believes has the most discerning literary audience.
