The irrepressible Lalu Prasad had a piece of alliance advice for Rahul Gandhi at the Opposition’s unity meeting on Friday — “Abhi bhi samay gaya, beeta nahi hai. Shaadi kariye aur hum log baraat chalein. Shaadi kariye. Baat maniye (It is still not too late. Get married so we can participate in the marriage procession. Get married. Pay heed to our suggestion).”
Prospective groom apart, Lalu also had some personal grooming advice for Rahul — don’t grow your beard too long.
Speaking at the end of the Opposition meeting in Patna, the RJD chief had started by going hammer and tongs at the BJP and Prime Minister Narendra Modi and hailing Rahul for the Bharat Jodo Yatra when chief minister Nitish Kumar, seated next to the veteran leader, nudged and prompted him to switch to another track by signalling to Rahul’s beard.
Lalu, tongue firmly in cheek, needed no second invitation. “Now don’t grow it any further. Modi does not shave completely. Hence it is even Nitish’s opinion that you should trim it,” he said.
Moving on to a tie-up of a kind not usually discussed at political meetings, Lalu told Rahul: “You did not heed our advice to get married. You should have tied the nuptial knot.”
With everyone in splits, Rahul, 53, gave a sheepish, embarrassed grin and nodded.
Lalu persisted: “Ekdum pukka karna padega. Aapki mummy bolti thi ki humara baat nahi manta hai, shaadi karwaiye (You will have to tie the knot. Your mother used to say that you don’t obey her and asked me to get you married).”
The former Bihar chief minister praised Rahul’s T-shirt and questioned why Modi did not get a full kurta stitched instead of dressing up in a “half kurta”.
Lalu underwent a kidney transplant in December last year and has been recuperating since then. This was the first political meeting he attended in a long time, as he had been in jail after his conviction in fodder scam cases.
“Ab hum poori tarah theek ho gaye hain, aur Narendra Modi ko bhi poori tarah theek kar denge (I am completely well now and will set Narendra Modi right as well),” Lalu wisecracked.
Attacking the BJP for invoking gods and goddesses before elections, Lalu said: “They used to contest polls in the name of Lord Hanuman. But he (Hanuman) became angry in Karnataka and dealt them such a blow with his mace that Rahul’s party won.”
Talking about the efforts to forge Opposition unity, Lalu said: “We are now gathering all the colleagues of Hanuman — Angad, Sugriv, Nal, Neel. You bet the BJP and Modi are going to face a hard time.”
The RJD leader wondered how Modi was gifting sandalwood to the President of the US — a country that had stopped him from travelling there after the Gujarat riots.
“How did the US forget this?” Lalu asked.
The RJD chief also wondered why the Centre had stopped the Rs 2,000 notes and slammed the government for the rising inflation and unemployment in the country.
