Monday, 23 December 2024
Monday, 23 December 2024
‘Baldness cure for Rs 20’ craze in Meerut
Meerut witnessed scenes straight out of a comedy movie this week when the promise of hair restoration for just Rs 20 sparked a frenzy so wild it might as well have been the Hair Games: Catching Roots.
It all began with a social media video claiming that a miraculous potion could transform barren heads into lush forests of hair. The catch? It would cost only Rs 20 to apply, though you'd need to shell out Rs 300 for the accompanying magic oil. Hopeful balding individuals, armed with razor-sharp dreams and freshly shaved heads, thronged to a local banquet hall. Little did they know they were signing up for a festival of chaos rather than follicles.
The venue was quickly overrun, with thousands arriving from every corner of India, including folks who hadn’t seen hair since the colonial era. The organisers were blindsided. They hastily relocated the “hair camp” to an open ground, introducing a token system to manage the wave of follicle fanatics. But even this proved futile as the growing crowd caused traffic jams that rivalled the Delhi-Gurgaon border during peak hours.
Local barbers turned the crisis into an opportunity, setting up makeshift shaving booths to meet the camp’s “clean scalp” requirement. The hilarity came to a screeching halt when the miraculous oil began triggering allergic reactions, leaving scalps redder than a politician’s face caught in a scandal. Complaints poured in, leading to the arrest of the masterminds behind this hair-raising fiasco.
As it turns out, the trio of men – one of whom is bald, to boot – had been conducting similar “miracle camps” across cities, amassing lakhs of rupees while leaving behind a trail of itchy, angry customers.
Only GPay or cash: Fun wedding invite ticks all the boxes
A wedding invite of “Sharma Ji ki Ladki” and “Gopal Ji ka Ladka” spread like fire on social media for its witty and unconventional approach to Indian wedding norms.
The invite abandons the usual flowery language and instead roasts the societal norms, family dynamics, and typical behaviour of the guests. The card opens with a cheeky request for the guests. It says, “Your presence in our wedding is very important because if you don’t come who will criticise the food."
Referencing the typical family drama and the inevitable disagreements involving relatives like “Bua and Fufa Ji”, the card has guidelines for guests. From advising the guests to control their children from playing on the stage because it’s too expensive to be a playground to requesting them to greet fufa ji otherwise his face swells up like a golgappa, the humorous card resonated with social media users.
And as a gentle nudge to avoid waste, it reminds guests, “Do partake of the food, but only once; Rs 2,000 plate is the rate per plate, yaar.”
The wedding date, January 5, 2025, is another joke for the readers, described as being “selected by 3 pandits” while conveniently timed to avoid a kid’s exam dates.
The invite also takes a dig at typical family dynamics referring to the Bua-Fufaji duo as the “in-house kalesh expert.” Guests are politely asked not to bring gifts, with a direct request saying “only Google Pay or cash,” since the couple already has “seven dinner sets and 20 photo frames.”
Man swallows chick in urge to become father, dies
A 35-year-old was so desperate to become a father that he swallowed a live chick as part of a tantric remedy. But after that he couldn’t live long enough to see his dream come true.
Our man, of Chhattisgarh’s Chhindkalo village, had been struggling to become a father even after five years of marriage. He reportedly sought a local tantric’s help. As instructed, he managed to swallow a live chick hoping for a miraculous eradication of his infertility.
Unfortunately, the want-to-be father’s experiment did not pan out as planned. He felt dizzy and then collapsed. Even though he was immediately rushed to a nearby hospital, he could not be saved.
Initially, doctors struggled to figure the cause of his death. The exact reason came to light after his throat was examined via autopsy. The doctor discovered a chick, approximately 20cm in length, obstructing both Yadav’s airway and food passage, which had apparently led to asphyxiation.
"This is the first time I have encountered such a case in my career, having conducted over 15,000 post-mortems. The findings shocked us all," the doctor was quoted as saying by a news channel.
If only Anand had not skipped biology classes in school, his family and a poor bird would have been spared the horror.
Tata Play CEO's 'Rent people' post leaves netizens divided
Who would have thought that two simple words could cause such a stir? This week, Tata Play's CEO Harit Nagpal created quite a buzz on LinkedIn when he told companies to "rent people" instead of building careers.
In his post about treating employees well, Nagpal wrote that companies should let workers bring their own ideas and give them freedom to grow. Nice thought, right? But his opening line about "renting people" left many scratching their heads. It's a bit like walking into a restaurant and asking to rent a chef!
The comments section quickly turned into a battleground. Some people jumped to defend him, saying things like "What a powerful insight!" and "This is revolutionary thinking!" Others ranted that people aren't cars or apartments that you can rent for a while.
One supporter went as far as writing a mini-essay about how "renting talent" is the future of work. We wonder if they were trying just a little too hard to make "rent people" sound less awkward than it actually is.
Let's face it – in a country where millions of workers still fight for basic rights, suggesting that companies should "rent people" probably wasn't the smoothest way to talk about modern work culture. Maybe next time, a simple "hire people" would do the job just fine?
Word has it that job portals are now adding a new filter: "Available for Rent/Sale/Lease."
Peak calamity: Bengali wedding with catastrophic catering
Bengali weddings must have enough food to ensure guests can survive a year or three of famine later. But for one family of Gariahat in south Kolkata, their daughter’s wedding turned into a catastrophe, because of a caterer and a menu that remained a mere dream.
November 27 was meant to be a joyous occasion, with the bride dressed in crimson and gold, happy relatives gossiping, and a feast that included bengali wedding specials like koraishutir kochuri, chholar dal, aloo dum etcetera.
With 550 plates ordered, including exotic welcome drinks like pinacoladas, the groom’s relatives were expecting a feast.
But when the ceremony started and guests started arriving, the caterer was missing. By the time the baraat arrived, the buffet tables remained empty, and there was utter chaos. Everyone knows how seriously Bengali wedding guests take their fish fry and mutton kosha.
At this point, the bride’s father rushed to the local market, procuring ingredients to whip up a last-minute menu of luchi and aloor tarkari.
Despite their efforts, nearly 200 guests left, grumbling about the lack of food.
“This wasn’t just about food,” said the bride’s mother. “It was about our family’s honour, especially during a Bengali wedding!
The police arrested the caterer, unearthing a history of similar scams.
