On playing someone against type
The fact that Nanki is so different from who I am in every way is one of the major reasons I signed on. My own personality is very different. The process of playing her was so challenging, so extensive and so exhausting in a way that at the end of the day, I would literally just fall into my bed.
On pushing herself physically and mentally to play Nanki
I have been saying that playing Nanki has been emotionally exhausting, but I have realised that the part has been physically exhausting too. The look took a lot of time to get into, what with all the tattoos and piercings. But looks are deceiving because as powerful and strong and badass as she looks outside, internally Nanki is very fragile. She has quite a strong exterior, but a very weak interior because of issues in her childhood, her past and the secrets that she has been hiding. It’s more a projection… the person that you see outside is a mask, it’s kind of an armour for her.
For me, it was the most liberating experience to sink my teeth into a character where I had to push my boundaries, extensively prep for the role… I really had to dig into those deep parts. When you read about the Nirbhaya case or several other cases about assault on women, it does break your heart into a hundred pieces. Then you reach a stage of anger and finally that stage when you just don’t want to think about it because you don’t want to let yourself break completely. But just imagine the state of someone who has actually been through it and has to deal with it every single day of their lives. That, for me, was something I really had to empathise with. It was a very emotional and empathetic experience for me, and while as an actor I am happy I got to play a part like this, I would hope and pray that no one has to go through something like this.
On her out-of-the-box look
My reference point for Nanki’s character was actually Ruchi (Narain, the film’s director). While I was doing readings with her, I realised how much Nanki was like Ruchi in her younger days. There was a lot of Ruchi in there. Also, while we were work-shopping, we met a lot of people who have had similar experiences like Nanki has had in her life. The research we did was quite extensive, with a lot of real-life cases, but the biggest reference for me was Ruchi.
On the biggest challenges
Challenges only make you grow as a person and an artiste. I think the whole graph of this character, her transition from the badass she is to what happens in the climax… that I think was the biggest challenge, to get that graph right.
On the film’s relevance among the youth of today
It’s set in a college and I feel it’s extremely relevant to a lot of things that are happening today. That’s one of the primary reasons why I connected to the script and wanted to do it because I realised how close to it we all are. Also, the film deals with things we hear from friends or read about in the newspapers, but when it happens so close to home… when it hits you when you least expect it, when shit gets real, if I may put it in that way (laughs), that’s when lives change. So when something like that happens to the young kids in Guilty, it hits them hard and how they deal with it — for better or for worse — is the crux of the film.
On Netflix original Lust Stories being a game-changer in her career
I think Lust Stories made people see the actor in me. I am extremely grateful that Karan Johar (the director of the short in Lust Stories that starred Kiara and Vicky Kaushal) gave me that opportunity. I will always be close to that role (Megha, inset).
On mixing mediums going forward
For me, content has always been king, regardless of medium, language or platform. If there is a film that I am extremely, extremely passionate about, then I will be a part of it. That’s how I have always seen it and I hope to carry the same clarity and vision in my career going forward.
