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Virat Kohli admits to not touching bat during break, was 'mentally down'

'I came to realisation that I was trying to fake my intensity a bit recently'

Virat Kohli slogs it out at the nets in Dubai Twitter/@BCCI

PTI
Dubai | Published 27.08.22, 02:32 PM

The prolonged lean patch did take a toll on Virat Kohli's "mental health" as the former India captain admitted to not having touched the bat during the month-long break prior to Asia Cup.

Kohli has been out without an international hundred for nearly three years but his poor run of form did affect him as he revealed that at times he was "faking intensity" in trying to show that he is an epitome of mental strength.

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"I am not shy to admit that I was feeling mentally down," the former India skipper told "Star Sports" in an episode of "Virat: Heart to Heart".

Following the tour, Kohli took a break, skipping two white-ball series in the West Indies and Zimbabwe.

"For the first time in 10 years, I didn't touch my bat for a month. I came to realisation that I was trying to fake my intensity a bit recently," Kohli said.

"I was convincing myself that no, you had the intensity. But your body was telling you to stop. The mind was telling me to take a break and step back."

Mental health issues are a reality and just like Ben Stokes said in his docu-series, Kohli also spoke about need to not keep the feelings bottled up.

"This is a very normal thing to feel, but we don't speak because we are hesitant. We don't want to be looked at as mentally weak. Trust me, faking to be strong is far worse than admitting to be weak."

Kohli's last international century came during the pink ball Test against Bangladesh at the Eden Gardens in 2019. His highest score in his last five matches, including two ODIs, two T20Is and a Test, has been 20 in India's loss to England in the rescheduled fifth Test.

Kohli, who has relinquished his captaincy at Royal Challengers Bangalore, also had a quiet IPL-15, scoring 341 runs from 16 matches at an average of 22.73.

"I'm looked at as a guy who is mentally very strong and I am. But everyone has a limit and you need to recognize that limit, otherwise things can get unhealthy for you," he said.

"This period taught me a lot of things that I wasn't allowing to come to surface. When they eventually came up, I embraced it."

Kohli will now return to action in India's Asia Cup opener against Pakistan on August 28.

"I want to make my team win at any cost and if that means I am gasping for breath when I walk off the field then so be it," he said.

"I mean that's the kind of preparation I go through to be able to play like that. Wo naturally nahi ho raha tha aur mujhe push karna pad raha tha (I was not able to get that high intensity naturally, I was pushing myself to do it). But I just didn't know it," said Kohli.

On his high-intensity approach on the field, Kohli said, "People ask me a lot, how do you do this on the field and how do you carry on with so much intensity.

"I just tell them I love playing the game and I love the fact that I have so much to contribute to every ball, and I will give every inch of my energy on the field."

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