Love can succeed in our lives only if we give it a chance: Preeti Shenoy

Preeti Shenoy, much like every other Indian, grew up watching Bollywood and internalising the standards of love that were set in celluloid. Love in Bollywood movies is often deceptively simple — boy meets girl, boy chases girl, girl falls in love, a problem emerges, the problem is resolved, the end. However, love in real life rarely follows the same script. It is much more complex and is at the core of what it means to be human. Shenoy believes that relationships, be they romantic, friendly, or familial, are never black or white, but always grey. It is this greyness that she attempts to capture in all her books.

At the latest session of An Author’s Afternoon, organised by Prabha Khaitan Foundation at Taj Bengal, in association with Shree Cement Limited, with My Kolkata as digital partner, Shenoy discussed her books, what love means to her, and more with Swati Gautam, founder and CEO of Necessity, India’s only brand for customised lingerie for women.

‘Writing is powerful because it can help change people’s lives for the better’

For most of her life, Shenoy has loved writing. Even though writing was not something she dreamt of doing professionally, it has always given her joy. Be it writing short stories as a kid or journaling during motherhood, writing has been her safe space, including the time when she lost her father: “I was devastated and didn’t know how to cope with the grief. That’s when I started blogging — it became my outlet, something I did for myself.” This marked the beginning of Shenoy’s formal writing journey. Gradually, she became a popular blogger, which led her to land jobs with several publications. After almost two years since her first article, she wrote her first book, 34 Bubbglegums and Candies (2008). She held on to the feeling of joy that writing gave her and recognised the power it held: “Writing is powerful because it can help change people’s lives for the better. When I get messages from my readers that my writing has given them hope or has saved their lives, it means the world to me.”

Shenoy does not limit herself to being an author. She considers herself an artist who seeks to sketch life wherever she goes. For her, sketching is like collecting memorabilia, which she uses as inspiration for her books. “My books are not just romance, there’s so much more to them. They represent a slice of life and, in each of my books, I tackle a different theme. I like writing about things that I feel strongly about, but can do nothing about at the moment,” shared Shenoy. Shenoy’s books have dealt with a variety of themes like bipolar disorder, self-help, social class divide, gender issues, among others. Her latest book, All The Love You Deserve, is about how to cope with post-pandemic life. “The pandemic has changed all of us and we all feel very different,” remarked Shenoy.

‘Reading a book is like giving the author a gift of your time’

Shenoy went on to explain how love in today’s world is very different from the time she grew up in: “Today’s youth have a choice, a choice to love who they want and even settle down if they want. What matters is what they value the most, and finding that focus that leads them to grow.” Shenoy feels it is vital to make choices, be it in love or elsewhere in life, as we all need something to hold on to in a chaotic world. At the same time, she acknowledged that the meaning of love varies from person to person: “What I consider as love, you may not, and that’s fine. However, you need to give love a chance. Love can succeed in our lives only if we give it a chance.” For Shenoy, understanding love is about understanding someone else’s love language, which takes time and sometimes becomes the biggest test of love.

Towards the end of the conversation, Shenoy segued to discuss the proliferation of self- publishing, saying: “I won’t be a snob and say that these people shouldn’t write books, as it’s their prerogative and it is, in some ways, helping the economy. However, as a reader, I still hold the power to choose if I want to read that book or not. Reading a book is like giving the author a gift of your time. So, one should always pick books that speak to them and not read for the sake of reading.” Shenoy believes that one cannot become a best-selling author in 15 days, as it requires a lot of hard work. She feels that if someone wants to write, then they should be encouraged. But the quality of an author’s output also matters, over and above getting the tag of an author. The session ended with Shenoy interacting with the audience and answering some of their questions.

Guests speak

“The incidents that today’s author spoke about revolve around stories that you and I come across daily, whether it is mental health issues or stories of our ancestors or about childhood and children. I think she covered quite a wide spectrum of topics, and I’m looking forward to reading all her books.”

— Esha Dutta, honorary convener of Northeast Affairs of Prabha Khaitan Foundation

“This was a lovely event and I came to know about so many books written by Preeti Shenoy. I thoroughly enjoyed it.”

— Piu Sharma, CSR consultant

“The event was very meaningful because here was a chance to speak to a person who has been delving into relationships for a very long time. Thanks to social media, our lives now revolve around relationships… All we do is talk about relationships. To me, that was the most interesting part, and that’s why I wanted to be here and ask Preeti Shenoy all the questions that I hope the audience wanted to ask.”

— Swati Gautam, founder and CEO, Necessity

“It was an engaging session involving Preeti. I had only known of her through her books, but I was pleasantly surprised to learn that she also paints and is a fitness enthusiast.”

— K. Mohanchandran, senior vice president of operations, IHCL